How To Keep Kids From Stepping Into the Garden
Toddlers have this knack for stomping on precious plants with complete unawareness to the effects of their actions. Boundaries are an important life lesson, whether they are material or emotional. Teaching and enforcing boundaries is an art, that once mastered can reset many areas of your life. Keep toddlers out of the garden with these 5 simple steps.
Perhaps your garden is from pre-kid days, or you are in charge of a new garden in a school setting or maybe you like to visit public gardens and can’t relax with the continuous policing of your children. All three reasons will land you with the same struggle of how to keep little feet out of the garden beds.
If you’ve landed here and don’t understand the concern that comes with stepping in a garden bed, let me explain:
When we walk, our weight creates compaction, this alters soil structure and microbial activity and can lead to a loss of water retention and soil health.
Not all plants are visible throughout the year. There may be ‘gaps’ in a garden bed that appear to be barren, yet a plant is sleeping just below the surface. Stepping on it can cause damage.
Our footwear can track in all manner of seeds and unwanted items. It is impossible to know what is sticking to the underside of a shoe but it can carry with it the seeds of an invasive plant that is now hitching a ride into a new area.
And for the truly oblivious (I’m looking at all the toddlers out there), stomping on live plants can damage, and/or kill the plant.
Why are garden boundaries an important lesson?
Children need limits. Limits provide them with a sense of security and control in a rapidly changing environment. They will test boundaries until they find a hard limit. They will test boundaries more, when they feel safe and secure, (aka with Mom). A garden boundary provides an opportunity for teaching and learning between child and caregiver, where the end result is respect for both parties and a third, mother nature.
Often children are ‘set loose’ upon nature out of parent and caregiver fatigue. In the right setting there is nothing wrong with this. When children are not shown how to interact with their environment, they grow up without a respect or admiration for it. Once they take on adult form, this can look like developers moving into protected environmental lands for the sake of making a dollar, or more simple acts like littering and defacing or harming natural elements, or over-harvesting wild leeks for a quick profit.
Ever notice how newly planted trees near schools are wrapped in cages? It’s not to keep bunnies out, but rather to keep children from damaging a tree that has not yet developed roots.
Benefits of teaching boundaries:
Many life skills require practice and not all of us were raised knowing or having personal boundaries. You might be in the thick of parenthood and feel like your children are running your life, that you receive little to no respect, and you feel burnt out, out of control and powerless.
When we hold boundaries in our own life we teach others how to treat us. We set the tone. The longer we wait to establish these lines in the sand the harder it becomes to maintain them. Often we are not aware that it is a problem until we witness our children facing similar struggles to us. We immediately want to help them, teach them how to hold their own.
Children are mirrors. Blank slates that are reflecting their environment back. The best way to teach boundaries is to model having boundaries. If this is new and overwhelming, the garden is a kind and forgiving teacher, so this is a great place to start.
The tactics we use to enforce boundaries, with the goal of keeping children out of a garden, can be reused in other aspects of our life.
How To Keep Kids From Stepping Into the Garden
Empathize with the need
Something is pulling children into the garden. Rarely is it malice. It is often curiosity, them performing a natural developmental activity such as fine motor development, balance, sensory stimulation etc. They are simply responding to their innate needs. This should be encouraged but in an appropriate setting. Seeing that they want something, and verbally acknowledging what they are trying to do is the first step in redirecting.
What this looks like: “It looks like you really like that yellow flower, are you trying to smell it? I bet it smells lovely!”
Or “that dirt looks like so much fun! Look at how you are getting your whole hand in there!”
You are showing that their desire is very right and that there is no shame in their curiosity and exploration.
Meet their need
If possible, give them what they are after, in an appropriate setting. Avoid using the word “no”, reserving it for critical moments. I prefer the “ta” sound. Used consistently in a redirection my kids know that when they hear it, I am interfering but the fun isn’t ending. It causes them to pause but there are no meltdowns or power struggles involved.
What this looks like: “Ta! How about we take this dirt over here so you can keep playing but we don’t squish the flowers”
Or “Ta! You really want to smell that flower! Let me help you fly your nose in to smell. (Lift kid on for a sniff) Hey look! There are more flowers just like it over here that you can reach all by yourself!! I’ll race you!”
Your encouraging their exploration but within limits that respect all involved. You are not stopping the action, and instead are altering it.
Make it clear
Nothing nuanced. If you expect your toddler to understand how this patch of green is different from that patch of green you’ll both be disappointed. Many adults (mail delivery people I’m looking at you!) struggle with this. We may be able to distinguish subtle boundaries in a garden or remember where a plant was placed. It is unrealistic to expect the same from a child.
In the garden this looks like:
-Sharp, deeply edged beds. When there is a material change along with a grade change it will be much more obvious that, this is the lawn for walking and, this is the off limits area. They may even trip or slide into the bed if they wander too close. It might be jarring but rarely does such a slip cause injury or need for concern. It will further establish the two zones as different.
-Physical outlines. Using rocks, logs, wood, pavers whatever you need or want the aesthetics to be, outline the space. Do not use small sticks or small rocks that can easily be lifted and carried off or rearranged by the child. Make it beefy enough that it is a clear garden fixture and is easily noticed. In my garden we have a mix of tree stumps, small logs (4” diameter), and granite rocks. These outline beds and or pathways.Consistency
The quickest way to undue a boundary is to waffle on where the line is drawn. Even adults struggle when it is a grey zone. For perspective, consider the Ontario lockdown regulations and how the rules constantly change and the confusion and frustration it brings. Eventually we reach a point where we say “screw it, these rules are stupid”, because there is no consistency or follow through.
If you’ve delineated your garden areas now it is time to enforce. Every. Single. Time. Feel free to redraw the lines or add a pathway if you realize the initial plan wasn’t the best, but don’t allow occasional stepping into the space. In the beginning this will feel exhausting. You’ll correct and correct again. But each interaction is firming the limit, until it is accepted. Caregivers need to out-stamina the little ones.
Fill the space with as many yes’s as there are no’s.
You are here because you want to spend time in the garden with your little ones, and if they aren’t happy out there, no one will enjoy the process. Nobody enjoys being continuously scolded, corrected or shamed. Changes might be needed, but work to make the space one that is kid friendly. Don’t worry, this does not have to look like plastic playground equipment everywhere.
Peruse through our collection of kid focused garden articles for ideas and how-to’s to make this a reality.
It is my goal with Buying Thyme to connect the community to nature and practice sustainability practices so we can better our patch of the ecosystem. Our flowers invite you to slow down, savor simple joys, and celebrate the beauty of the seasons wherever you take them, but our blog teaches you how you can apply everything we have learned, on your own property! For our Southern Ontario specific gardening tips make sure to peruse our other blog articles here.
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